The reason you don't lead, get deeply involved in the life of the church, or follow Jesus and become a Christian comes down to this: What if?
What if you try to lead and no one follows? What if people find out what you're really like? What if you 'take up your cross and follow Jesus' only to discover that being a Christian doesn't make your life easier?
Let's be honest, the real reason you refuse to ___________ is because it's frightening and difficult.
Once you own up to that, then you're ready to press into this bit of good news: 'Whatever it is, don't worry about it. Thank God for what you have and what you and remember this as you ask him for help - Jesus is making all things new, God will make sure this new opportunity will turn out for your good, he will never leave you or abandon you. And now with that promise to protect you, take advantage of what God has put in front of you' (Philippians 4:6-7, my translation).
Repeat after me: I can lead. I can let people into my life. I can trust Jesus and follow him.